Too Busy to Talk? what the hell are you doing!?!?!?
With everyone in lock down I suggested our girls Whatsapp group becomes a ‘Keeping us sane’ group that include Zoom dates too.
The first couple went well we drank wine, talked over each other and laughed. Then another was put in the calendar and my sister and I weren’t in the right frame of mind after a bad lockdown day, so we bailed.
I wondered if the group had gone ahead with the chat anyway. I wouldn’t know. Normally when you don’t reply on Whatsapp, the conversation happens anyway and you can see it. With Zoom, it’s like the party going ahead without you.
A friend of mine who is the social butterfly messaged to say she was happy to bail tonight as she’d been out (virtually) for a few hours and was a bit drunk. She lives alone (correction in case she reads this – with her dog, that is her baby) so I was happy she’d been in contact with mates and had a drink.
I don’t get FOMO with her and she spreads her love so widely, we all get some in the end. She works too hard but she plays hard – well more socialises these days, we’re getting on a bit!
But I worried for her and my other friends who are still working, I had visions of her connected to her machine all day keeping the business going, probably more than she usually does and then spending the evening chatting to her pockets of friends, overcompensating, drinking too much (well we all are!) and not taking any time out for herself.
This is her chance to take that time out, do what the hell she wanted, as long as it was in her own home, or walking the dog. I didn’t want her to spread herself too thin during the day or night, spreading her virtual love across these now virtual friendships and then stressing about pleasing everyone.
I’m waiting to put another calendar date in the diary. We used to do Wine and Chilli Wednesday many years ago, maybe now is the chance to revive it. But that’s a whole week away, diaries are getting full. People are finding their new normal, we can go a week without the whole group chatting in the ‘ before lockdown’ world.
Before all of this I was never worried if someone said they couldn’t make a Wine and Chilli night. Now if they don’t answer my zoom call when we connect, I may take offence!
Choosing another virtual friend over me, seems worse than seeing ‘Tamara has left the Group’ It’s just not something I’m ready for!
adaptingtoparenthood 